Loving the World

Do I love the World? Honestly? I try to make this question infinitely more complicated than it really is. Probably because I don’t think I like the simple answer.

I try to hide behind my self-proclaimed introvert tag. I try to hide behind the fact that I am not an evangelist (at least not in the sense that being an evangelist is my primary calling.) I try to hide behind the idea that God will send me a sign that He wants me to love the World (in specific ways) while trying to contextualize away His commands to do so with my “works.”

I feel like I have opportunities all the time. Whenever I am invited to do something, like go to a nursing home with my small group, I have a choice. Just like when I see someone, by God’s grace, that I know needs Jesus, I have a choice. I have a choice to act, a choice to love. Or, I have a choice to hide.

I have been reflecting on the following story a lot lately:
Acts 9:10-22 “Now there was a disciple at Damascus named Ananias. The Lord said to him in a vision, “Ananias.” And he said, “Here I am, Lord.” 11 And the Lord said to him, “Rise and go to the street called Straight, and at the house of Judas look for a man of Tarsus named Saul, for behold, he is praying, 12 and he has seen in a vision a man named Ananias come in and lay his hands on him so that he might regain his sight.” 13 But Ananias answered, “Lord, I have heard from many about this man, how much evil he has done to your saints at Jerusalem. 14 And here he has authority from the chief priests to bind all who call on your name.” 15 But the Lord said to him, “Go, for he is a chosen instrument of mine to carry my name before the Gentiles and kings and the children of Israel. 16 For I will show him how much he must suffer for the sake of my name.” 17 So Ananias departed and entered the house. And laying his hands on him he said, “Brother Saul, the Lord Jesus who appeared to you on the road by which you came has sent me so that you may regain your sight and be filled with the Holy Spirit.” 18 And immediately something like scales fell from his eyes, and he regained his sight. Then he rose and was baptized; 19 and taking food, he was strengthened.
Saul Proclaims Jesus in Synagogues
For some days he was with the disciples at Damascus. 20 And immediately he proclaimed Jesus in the synagogues, saying, “He is the Son of God.” 21 And all who heard him were amazed and said, “Is not this the man who made havoc in Jerusalem of those who called upon this name? And has he not come here for this purpose, to bring them bound before the chief priests?” 22 But Saul increased all the more in strength, and confounded the Jews who lived in Damascus by proving that Jesus was the Christ.”

Did Ananias have a choice? I read this at first and think “If God ever tells me in a vision to go pray for a blind man to receive his sight I will know for sure what to do.” But, that actually happened to me once. Five summers ago, I was praying and reading in a park and had a great desire to see the Kingdom manifest around me in physical healing. I read scripture that convicted me that if I wanted to see that happen I needed to act in faith. Hastily, I prayed to God and told Him that I would pray for the next person I encountered that had an obvious need for physical healing. Within minutes as I walked a man approached me with sunglasses and a white cane. I lost my nerve and thought surely You are joking. Ananias had a choice.

I am convinced He wasn’t joking. It is a good reminder for me not to judge Ananias.

I have also been convinced that visions are not a prerequisite for action. A good test for me is if I get an idea to do something I really don’t want to do but it is clear that it would result in love that I should do it. Period.

I have also been reading The Apostle by John Pollock (an excellent book about the life of Paul) and Mr. Pollock points out something else about this Ananias:
“And he, Ananias the obscure, never heard of before or since, had been chosen to baptize Saul-it was the first example of a historical pattern that great ambassadors for Christ, however much prepared in other ways, are brought to their vocation by unimportant agents: Augustine hears a child’s voice repeat, ‘Take up and read!’ John Wesley listens to an anonymous Moravian reading Luther; D.L. Moody, wrapping up shoes in a store, pauses for a few words from his Sunday School teacher; Charles Haddon Spurgeon, sheltering from a snowstorm, hears a workingman in a snow-bound minister’s pulpit.”

Who have I not extended Love to? I want to Love the World.

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